The Seconds Since

The seconds
have grown larger
Since.
Used to be
I couldn't pick them up
with my bare hands;
they passed so fast
and I dashed
through the days
chasing them.
Now
I see them
with my naked eye.
They grow larger as I watch,
filling up with your absence,
crowding the breath from my chest,
pushing thoughts out of my head.
They pulse with the beat
that your heart no longer keeps,
wrap themselves around me
and hold me down,
pour cement into my belly,
lava in my chest.
They grow large and heavy
like an earth without gravity,
so that I float around
impotent
inside them.
They fill up with galaxies --
whole universes
stretched end to end
across forever,
and you are not
in any of them.